The following article appears in the San Diego MD magazine, Oct/Nov 2009 issue
“No way, I’ll throw her out of the house – I don’t want a caregiver”
by Ron Kinder, Owner, Home Care Assistance
Convincing a parent that he needs help at home can sometime be a challenge. The headline above is exactly what the father yelled at his daughter. The daughter knew her father needed help – his Alzheimer’s was progressing and he was getting very forgetful of important things – like turning off the stove.
But let’s face it, none of us want to loose our independence or our dignity. It’s easy to conjure up images of Nurse Ratched, the controlling, sadistic asylum nurse in “One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest,” as our domineering caregiver.
Male clients, in particular, often have a harder time understanding that they’ll have more freedom, not less, if someone is helping them with some of the daily chores that have just become more difficult to accomplish.
A good homecare agency can help solve what sometimes becomes a very sore and emotional point between parents and children. In this true case, our Case Manager discussed the father’s habits and enjoyments with the daughter and found that he liked to go out to lunch every day and occasionally, to a nearby Indian casino to play the slot machines.
She suggested that maybe the Father would be safer with a security guard – and he agreed! So one of our male caregivers (aka Security Guard Jim), takes care of Ed in his home – and makes sure that he is safe when they go out to lunch – and occasionally, to play the slots at the nearby casino. Our caregivers have also taken on the roles of tennis players and chefs in order to surmount initial objections.
Studies show that a majority of older adults prefer to remain in their homes as long as possible. Homecare can enable them to maintain the lifestyle and freedom they deserve.
